Validation

A calling is based on a gifting.  And a gifting is a responsibility.  A privilege.  It assumes work.  It also assumes joy.  It assumes deep connectedness.  We are all connected.  Not just we, but even our giftedness, is connected.  My giftedness ultimately intersects with yours. My gifts may be exactly what you need.

As we are interconnected by our callings, we are also extra-connected by them.  I mean that our gifts connect us to others on a journey similar to the one we are on. Others have gifts like we do.  Learning that connects us. We encourage each other that gifts matter. What we do with them actually makes a difference!

How and when these connections are made is a bit of a mystery.

No one can predict the web of their own interconnectedness.  No one.  The network of connections is too great.  The to whom and from whom of them is beyond our abilty to understand.  It is like the wind.  And yet, we get to experience the reality of them.  To watch the connections being made.

Almost in third person.  Which ones will stick and how will they will stick?  A mystery.  Some connections will stick for a particular season or time.  Some will last forever.  Some will never work.  Ambition drives us to make certain connections specific to succeeding in a particular industry.  Or so we think. We are really seeking validation.

But why?  Why do we believe only the “right” connections can get us where we are going?

What approval we seek and why is VERY indicative of our definition of success.  For some, success measures may seem obvious.  There are defined pre-packaged versions of success.  People in the “industry” will tell you only they can get you to their exclusive version of success. Will you accept that?

Or will you set your own path?  Be different!  Show the world there is another way.  As fate usually has it, those who “buck” the system end up being the ones celebrated by it.  They are rebels with a cause.  They define their own success.  And make it happen that way.    

We need forgiveness.  At least I do.  For thinking success must look a certain way.  For assuming someone else’s version should be mine.  That is actually envy.  And it is wrong!  And potentially destructive.  I repent. And ask for help to clear the way to a renewed definition of success.  

Or at least the courage to try.  Really try.  Not the sort of try that does something planning to fail.  Not a try that has a prepared excuse for a lack of execution.  Not the kind of try that assumes we probably deserve failure anyway.  But the try that wants to win.

The try that thinks it may just have a chance to win.    

Only there do we get the chance we are looking for.  Not to prove ourselves.  (A “chip on the shoulder” may be good motivation at first but eventually it wears thin.  It is not a real why.)  If we are seeking validation, or vindication to be worthy of our gifts, we must ask why. Who are we trying to impress and why?

Trying to prove your worth might make you hungry.  It might give you the hustle, desperate to show the world you have something to offer it. But usually it means you are still trying to win over a few specific people who failed you, or forgot you, or rejected you specifically.  It won’t work.

All the success in the world will not win the validation of some.  Even if they are impressed at the externals (money, fame, status), the heart is what the heart is.  It needs more.  Success is not enough to validate itself.

We need more.